Just Do It

I’ve got to admit that I had some trepidation when accessing Not Alone’s E-counseling services last Wednesday. I think I’m mentally well, but until last Wednesday, I'd never actually actually sat and talked with a bona fide medical professional about my experiences in war. I think, for me, some of the anxiety about talking with the counselor was the same kind of stress people get when getting a check up for cancer. If you don’t go find out, that means there’s not problem, right?

Wrong.

I realize now what I fool I was so many years ago to never see a medical professional when it is very possible that I did have PTSD. I think about where I am now. Where would I be if I didn’t drink myself into oblivion every night for three years, and instead tried to get well?

I was also worried before doing the E-counseling that, maybe if I did talk to him, some experience I hadn’t ever processed healthily might get galvanized and I might become overwhelmingly depressed. But that’s kind of the same idea as those nightly news reports about our nation’s weakness back in the day. Remember those? Is America’s water supply secure? Shh. Don’t ask that; you’re giving the terrorists ideas. When, in reality, if the danger is there, you shouldn’t ignore it because eventually you will get burned.

As it turned out, the counselor agreed with me, that I am well. As tough as I like to pretend to be sometimes, I can’t really tell you how good that makes me feel. It’s a clean bill of health that felt amazing to have reaffirmed. (And, yes, I know the E-counseling is more informative than personal and in-depth, but I trust the man’s intuition.)

At the end of the day, if you are dealing at all – and in any way – with the trauma of war, what can it really hurt to just go explore these services and see if they can help you at all? Who knows, it really could change you for the better. What is one hour when weighed against the rest of your life?

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